David DeAngelo
At some point a few years back I decided that I wanted to improve my dating life.
So I start scouring the internet for dating advice one girlfriendless evening with a gooey, pathetic embarrassment and a song in my head repeating: “Only losers look for dating advice on the internet…dork.”
And I'm in my skivvies. Yup.
They say (whoever the hell “they” are) that all growth takes place outside of your comfort zone.
These days it's a foreshadowing of good things to come every time I feel uncomfortable, embarrassed, etc., because I know it to be absolutely true for me that personal growth DOES require stepping outside of the warm, comfy house of the mind – strewn with addictive yet complacency-fostering conveniences, unchallenged habits, assumptions and beliefs.
I came across David DeAngelo's “Double Your Dating” ebook and got me a copy. This was gold Jerry, gold!
Step by illuminating step, Dave deconstructed the dating paradigm with a deep, manly, humorous voice that kept calling me a wussy from behind my computer screen.
The process of dewussification had begun and I am proud to say that today I have a tuft of mahogany-brown chest hair that would make Thomas Magnum slightly less bronze with envy.
But seriously, my dating life HAS improved significantly in quantity AND quality with David's advice.
What sets Dave apart from the countless other dudes in the “seduction” community is that he advocates being an interesting, educated, successful person FOR YOURSELF. The result is that one “naturally” begins to attract what they want to them.
His body language program is especially kick-ass.
The main benefit I got out of all this was an introduction into the world of self-improvement and pop psychology and realized that you can be whoever and however you want to be.
We are NOT inevitable products of our genetics, upbringing or environment: we are self-determined, dynamic, infinite creatures.
Check out Dave's stuff: www.doubleyourdating.com
Goodies in the same vein: Brent Smith – www.absolutepowerdating.com
The Sedona Method by Hale Dwoskin is basically a program that teaches you how to release all unproductive emotions. I personally know several VERY influential people who practice it daily.
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Ayn Rand:
Ayn Rand came to me at a time in my life when I got my first taste of true independence: living on my own (and all the yummy bills that go along with it), going to college and working full time while trying to maintain some semblance of a social life.
Principally – and according to the chick, herself – Rand was a novelist, whose books are sheer plotline and forward-moving dialogue (save a notoriously long-ass speech).
Her writing is meticulously constructed with many intertwining threads of interest, unforgettable characters and lofty exchanges of words that combine into a colorful tapestry that will stay with you until the day you're drooling on yourself and yelling at birds in the backyard (it'll happen to youuuuu)!!
It seriously is that memorable.
My main takeaway from her works is: Use your head . . . A lot!
Unfortunately, Ayn Rand did not consider psychology a science proper, and this is reflected in her inflexibility on the nature of personal character. She tried to stretch infinitely complex human psychology on the procrustean bed of [her] philosophy (objectivism).
The result is that her novels encourage textbook narcissism, emotional repression and conditional self and other-acceptance. No bueno.
Having said that though, Rand still rocks and her books are so rich and thick they're like philosophy smoothies that you can drink almost any time you need a nice sugar rush of hope and inspiration. Optimism? yea, she's got that.
Cuidado: Rand's books may cause lacrymation.
Recommendations:
Anthem – a short novelette set in the future – an eerie yet hopeful book. If you liked 1984 but want a happy ending, read this.
The Fountainhead – This book is about an unbending architect dude who will only build HIS way – the world be derned. There's also, Rape, Love, Rags-to-Riches. One of the most complete novels I've ever read.
Atlas Shrugged – Rand's magnum opus about . . . everything. You want a book that covers “life”? Here it is.
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Tim Ferriss:
Tim Ferriss is the New York Time's Best Selling Author of the “4 Hour Workweek” (published now in over 30 languages!) – a manifesto for financial and temporal liberation in the digital age. (How's THAT for a cliche book blurb?)
But on the real tip: this book blew my friggin' mind.
Tim done went and challenged a whole mess of assumptions Western society, media and cultural indoctrination..*ahem*..influence have infused into our mushy little medullas since a tender age.
First and foremost among these is that you have to work 60 hours a week in order to be successful, financially stable and secure in the “long run”.
Tim lays it out – step by step – how to find a business idea, grow the business quickly and efficiently using time management techniques and automate and/or outsource the whole damn thing so all that you're left with is a bit of email checking a few hours a week and a stream of incoming to finance all of your dreams.
Or something.
There's a philosophical aspect to the book that goes hand in glove with the principles Ferriss propounds:
Meaningful experience over accumulation of “dross” (crap you don't need); Less is More; Travel as a means of personal growth, etc.
Ferriss warns against becoming a member of the living dead, a fat man in a Mercedes or an overworked sarariman.
This is a blueprint for having the life of your dreams and a big SCREW YOU to the little-questioned maxim of “work your whole life, drive yourself to an early grave and retire when you're too old to do anything cool”.
I throw my middle finger up and join in the salute!
Here's what's amazing: probably 25% of people I tell about this book wave their hands at the level of my grill as if pantomiming a most gratifying bitch-slap and piffle at me: “Poppycock!” or some such dismissive comment.
But hey, it's all good.
Pura Vida.
[A toast of delicous vino to you – fellow human being.]
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